The 54th Deadline: Regardless of failure or success, you learn. Life grants people so many chances to get it right.
For the past few weeks, I have been feeling just awful for a variety of reasons. I have started to eat poorly again. Away with the pseudo-diet entirely at the moment. I am lazy about doing my walk around the block. I embrace days off like they are the most important thing in the world for me.
Just what the heck happened? What set me so off track that I feel so ashamed of how I have been approaching my daily routine?
Despair. Pure despair.
Just feeling a little blue is enough to make everything seem out of place. I want to set things on the right path again. I need to snap out of this funk.
Frankly, I have come a long way from hiding away in the basement, watching Netflix all day and going upstairs just to eat food before retreating again. Nonetheless, a rut is a rut. No fancy euphemism is going to change this fact.
Looking for the Bright Side
Depression sucks, but you learn to fight it over time. I spent a lot of years just caught up in the darkness of my misery. Nevertheless, this is why finding the bright side and looking for any glimmer of light in the tunnel is necessary to keep going forward.
Amid all of the dark thoughts that have made their way back to me, I need to be my voice of reason. I cannot be so darn afraid of this inner ordeal when I have survived through worse.
In many regards, I am proud of my progress. I should be. Of course, it is hard to find anything positive at times when I turn envious of others who are further ahead in life.
For many situations, I just have to keep trucking along and trust the journey, not the destination, that the universe has something awesome waiting for me in the end.
“Hope is my catalyst.” – Nhan Pham0 People like this post!
Also published on Medium.